Wednesday, September 30, 2015

monthly discipline: october

january: do things differently herehere and here.
february: just make it hereherehere and here.     
march: mostly vegan herehereherehere and here.
april: wake up before the sun five days a week here, here and here
may: exercise curiositherehere and here 
june: daily gratitude and generosity herehere and here
july: at least one mile a day here and here
august: beach body challenge here and here
september: lead with love and positivity here, herehere and here

october: vulnerability

Hello October!

i am simultaneously typing and nibbling on a heaping bowl of pumpkin ravioli. it is the quintessential flavor of fall. i have 9 pumpkins in or around our home. there is candy corn on the counter. is it officially autumn.
i arrived home today from an amazing evening listening to the words of Brene Brown. she filled an auditorium of 2,500 loyal fans. brene is an author and researcher who studies courage, vulnerability, shame and worthiness. life stuff. therapy stuff. if you haven't watched her TED Talk on vulnerability, please take 20 minutes and join 21 million other viewers. i am not a big reader, but her books captivate me. her work has moved me beyond compare. i have had true ah-ha moments through her lens. she is a teacher, a leader, an expert, a guide. her words have encouraged me to be more vulnerable and to tell my story. i feel compelled to do more. i want to be more vulnerable. this month i will. i hope you will join me.

a powerful quote that resides on the back cover of her latest best seller reads:

"the irony is that we attempt to disown our difficult stories to appear more whole or more acceptable, but our wholeness actually depends on the integration of all of our experiences, including the falls."

there is far too much shame in the world. when we don't talk about something, shame is in control. when we avoid certain topics, it is because of shame. shame keeps us disconnected. shame breeds in isolation. brene says that when people are brave, tell their stories and live their truths they morph into stronger more resilient versions of themselves. she wants us to lean into that discomfort and accept ourselves.

courage = be to imperfect
compassion = to be kind to ourselves first and then to others
connection = a result of authenticity

this month will be a book study with some of my own truths peppered in. a practice in vulnerability, yikes!  i hope you snatch up her book Rising Strong. either way, i will tell you all about it.

Thursday, September 24, 2015

birthday month round-up

the best part of age is wisdom. each year grants me more stability and capability. i am proud of my age, no shame in the number 37. we forge through each and every one of our years, i wouldn't discount one of them. 

here are some essential life hacks i have gathered in my treinta y siete anos: 

keeping a list of my inner circle and their birthdays helps me feel connected. find your tribe//love them hard. invest in your relationships. i have better friends today than i ever have. you have to hand pick the people you surround yourself with. 

love is a verb. 

"supporting another's success won't ever dampen yours." celebrate those around you and share kind words and encouragement often. 

i have an ongoing list of things to do...places to travel...restaurants to try. boredom does not exist. 
the world is fascinating, see and do as much as you can!

live your dreams! taking risks fills my life with challenge. i have done things people have questioned, but i follow my gut and am always glad i did. don't stay comfortable. 

everything in moderation, especially the sun. always wear sunscreen. your older self with thank your younger self. 

i love my career and will always work. it is my life purpose. some people say they are fortunate not to work. i feel fortunate to love my work. 

i don't have much of a relationship with the television. i occasionally watch, but not often. 

always smile and show excitement when greeting loved ones. 

i hire someone to clean my house monthly. i still vacuum and tidy up, but that one day each month is divine. 

invite younger people into your life, show them kind and supportive words. be good to them, they might take care of you one day. 

i don't nurture through food. i have a vegetarian kitchen and a carnivore husband. he still feels supremely loved and says he can't wait to get home everyday. 

acupuncture is medicinal for me. i am happily hooked.

i don't settle into gender roles, i think they are dangerous. we both prepare food. we both do laundry. we both vacuum. we both lift heavy things into the car. we both pick up dog poop. there is no resentment between us and we have a true partnership. as a marriage counselor i have seen far too many women resentful for the imbalance of house chores. don't try to be a super wife, it doesn't fare well over time. 

write thank you notes. expressing gratitude is imperative. 

laugh and be silly, at every age! "there is not a shred of evidence that life is serious" -ogden nash

be generous. even when you don't have much, always give. 

Sunday, September 13, 2015

september discipline: lead with love and positivity

as human beings, we can be quick to criticism. i want to give you a different perspective on criticism. i believe the critique is actually more about us than the subjects we are judging.

to me, criticism is actually the desire to connect. when we criticize, we are yearning for a connection or grieving the fact that we don't feel a connection with someone or something.

consider a recent scenario you have been critical of:
*a friend who has been distant
*a parent who is sarcastic
*a spouse who forgot your anniversary
*a waitress who got your order wrong

all of these examples are evidence of feeling misunderstood, disconnected and not feeling heard. when we are lacking association and feeling divided, our minds turn to criticism.

i try to consider this when feelings of judgment arise. what is it about the situation that is evoking the critical thoughts? am i actually grieving and feeling sadness that is being masked with a more energized anger?

we are hard wired toward judgment and i believe it is crucial for safety and security, however it can be taken too far causing a toxic environment. let's pause and try to lead with love and positivity next time we are inclined to criticize. 

Thursday, September 10, 2015

summer round-up

from family beach week to lake life in Minnesota...and finally a jaunt to Vegas
summers end was action packed and wildly fun-filled!

Topsail Beach, NC

little loves!

glitter bomb!

buddies for life!

in previous years this little fella was afraid of the ocean. this year we couldn't get him out of the water. yay Keegan!

sunrise tradition with my favorite 13 year old!

happy little boys, even with a salt water swallow

thank you for making these memories possible!

girl power!


hop on the boat to the golf course. hop on the boat to lunch. hop on the boat for cocktail hour. 
we could get used to that life. our friends little blonde haired boys charmed our socks off too! 

Las Vegas, NV

mixing business and pleasure has never been so wonderful. 5 nights in Vegas was spectacular! 

Monday, August 31, 2015

monthly discipline: september

january: do things differently herehere and here.
february: just make it hereherehere and here.     
march: mostly vegan herehereherehere and here.
april: wake up before the sun five days a week here, here and here
may: exercise curiositherehere and here 
june: daily gratitude and generosity herehere and here
july: at least one mile a day here and here
august: beach body challenge here and here

September: lead with love and positivity

contrary to popular belief, i am not Pollyanna. we all have an internal dialogue that waffles between positive and negative. i am hard wired toward positive. i have been told this reflects outwardly. my senior year of high school i was voted "little miss sunshine." it was very authentic and i honestly remember thinking everyone and everything was so cute. with age, wisdom, experience and heartbreak it becomes increasingly more challenging to stay in that mindset. it's an intention to see the world through rose colored glasses. 

i am extremely analytical, and at times that can work against me or make me lean toward a negative mind frame. in my humble opinion, focusing on the negative is easy. there are plenty of things to be fearful of and worry about. there are plenty of people to talk negatively about. i want to take a different path. 

i once read a quote that i have been thinking about incessantly. we should all be reminded of these wise words by Eleanor Roosevelt. 

this month, which happens to be my birth month (yay!) i am going to focus on not uttering negative words. we are all wired toward judgment, it's easy to do. instead let's choose to lead with love. i want to age gracefully and what comes out of our mouths is a direct reflection of how we feel about ourselves and the world around us. choose love! 

Tuesday, August 25, 2015

corona commercial

every year is a little different. the last two involved a professional photographer, which made us feel quite official. we have switched placement of chairs and even used the wrong chairs one year. 
while departing from the Cabo San Lucas airport last month, I spotted the inflatable Corona bottle and knew it had to join the rotation. 
we both stacked colorful bracelets. i went hippie. mom went classic. this is the third time we matched sunglasses. it really is one of my favorite photos of the year. cheers! 

* 2015 *

Sunday, August 23, 2015

august discipline: beach body challenge

3/4 of the way through and it's time for an update. is anyone following along with me? what started out as manageable has quickly turned intense! it looks simple on paper, however, isn't as easy as it appears. southern gent has joined forces with me again and we have been loyal every single day. i take that back, we have missed two days but then caught up with 4 exercises the following day--ouch! we walked or ran every morning of #familybeachweek, followed with the two exercises of the day. our bodies have been sore and tender in odd places. i have a new found respect for strength. i am not in this to lose weight, in fact i have gained a few lb's. just trying to trust the process. there was a time when i thought being skinny was attractive. i have shifted my mindset in recent years and am aiming for tone and strength, which is actually the really difficult stuff...and i am finding takes more time, patience and dedication. 
i had a strong epiphany the other day. both physically and emotionally, we have to endure great pain if we want to embody great strength. i am stronger and have more fortitude today, because of the pain i have weathered in this wonderful life. don't give up friends, it's always better on the other side. 

This site was made with love by Angie Makes